It has been a while since I've written something that accentuated anything except how characteristically dark my personality is, so here goes nothing.
This post is a bit of an ode to travel sites that don't give you quite the whole story about that hotel you just booked. You see, My family took a trip to Virginia for the weekend and needed someplace to stay. The logical 21st century progression of events ensued and my dear mother booked a room on travelocity, or expedia, or some other wittily named website that is supposed to save you money and make everyone happy. The problem with this scenario is that (insert name of witty website here) lied. (Disclaimer*** this entire situation could have been user error but I'm trying to give my flesh and blood mother the benefit of the doubt.) This hotel is not a 4 star beauty with all the modern amenities a girl could need. (Again, I have no idea if that's what the description for this hotel said, and I haven't been able to check for reasons I will expound upon later, but again, I'm giving my mother the benefit of the doubt that the description was something marketable and charming.) Here is a list that we composed of five things (all of which have happened to us within the last 48.5 hours) that may make you desire to move your reservation elsewhere.
1. You pull into the parking lot and see no other vehicles in sight. This is fine for midafternoon, since people are checking out and checking in and, well you get my point. This is not fine, however, for the late evening/night. If no one else is staying at this hotel, it is probably a pretty good sign you shouldn't either.
2. There are people painting the trim of the building purple and orange as you pull up to check in. I don't care what anybody says, purple and orange look ridiculous by themselves and tripley ridiculous together.
3. You have to ask for help getting your door open every time you "come home" because there seems to be some trick to getting the card and the machine aligned just perfectly.
4. The Internet is perpetually down. (this is the reason I still do not know what the description on the website said, though making this list has made me even more curious.)
5. There are NO other cars in the entire parking lot. I just felt the need to reiterate that because it is KEY to how totally sketchy this place actually is.
Ok, I am finished now. I had quite an urge to let the darkness within out and rant a little about American expectations, but I contained that monster. (You're welcome)
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